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Hands across the river
The Princeton Packet
Lifestyle
Friday, January 3, 2003
Written By Amy Brummer
Something good for
every neighborhood may have started in Bucks.
Most people would find
it easier to drive to the store than ask their neighbor to borrow a cup of sugar.
Such is life in the 21st century. It is also a life where children no longer play
in their front yards and suspicious strangers lurk around many corners.
It doesn't seem very neighborly. But Jeff and Barbara
Smith of Doylestown, Pa., along with their sons, Josh and Jeremy, are taking
steps to change that. They want neighbors across Pennsylvania and beyond to start
breaking bread together, so they worked to have the second Saturday in January declared
"Invite Your Neighbor to Dinner Day".
The inspiration came from a class Mr. and Mrs. Smith were taking through Landmark
Education, which offers courses on self-expression and living powerfully. As an assignment,
students were asked to create a project that would allow them to assess their leadership
skills and effectiveness in reaching their goals.
"I wanted to come up with something that the average American could do,"
Mr. Smith says. "We cam upon the idea of inviting your neighbor to dinner. The
idea is that you would invite a neighbor that you have never me, or that you have
waved at and never gotten a chance to know, to come over for a meal.
"By doing that, you would tighten the weave in America, and it would build new
relationships. It would build safety and security in your own backyard. It would
promote tolerance by getting to know different cultures."
Thought the course did not require them to follow through on the project, the Smiths
found the interest they had garnered was too strong to ignore. But they didn't know
exactly how to realize their vision of turning the concept into a national phenomenon.
"At some point, we realized that we had to start small," Mr. Smith says,
"The big thing that happened was that we got in touch with our local legislators,
our state representative and state senator. The representative said, 'I love this
idea,' and both the (Pennsylvania) House of Representatives and the State Senate
put through these proclamations that declared this and every second Saturday of January
as "Invite Your Neighbor to Dinner Day.'"
The Pennsylvania General Assembly ratified the motion on Nov. 19. Then the Smiths
waited for their press conference on C-SPAN and invitation to appear on Good Morning,
America. When reality set in, they realized the next big hurdle would be promoting
the even, so they have been busy putting out flyers at community events, grocery
stores and retailers, and regional schools.
Josh Smith, a junior at Central Bucks East High School, took on the project with
particular enthusiasm, using to to help fulfill his graduation requirement. The cirriculum
at the high school requires that students take on a project that challenges them
to make a learning stretch. While the process of having a resolution passed and following
through with the promotion of the event would have been satisfactory, he was also
interested in making a positive impact on his community.
"Times have really changed," Josh says. "My parents tell me how they
used to ride their bikes all around and into town and leave (them) unlocked, and
you can't do that anymore. It is really about bringing back old values in our country
that we have really lost sight of."
They have also branched out across state lines through their youngest son, Jeremy,
a fifth-grader at The Waldorf School of Princeton in Montgomery. Their flyers caught
the eye of Scott Albert, who works in the school's admissions department. Mr. Albert
is a perfect example of what the Smiths were hoping will happen with the event. After
seeing the flyer and going to the web site, Mr. Albert recognized it as a wake-up
call.
A 20-year resident of Lawrence, Mr. Albert recently moved to a new house.
"I think that as one who has always been community-minded," Mr. Albert
says, "I've paused and realized that since the move to the new house, I have
made no effort to get to know my neighbors, and it would be so easy to continue to
do that. It is so easy to pull the car in, go into the house, close the door, cook,
clean, get on the computer, watch television, do whatever you do and not make much
effort at all to get to know people outside.
"I just decided that it was time to step out of the comfort zone a little bit.
As it turns out, we have someone who just moved in next door from California, so
this was a nice excuse to invite her over and get to know other people in the community."
By building these bridges, the Smiths of Doylestown feel that neighborhoods, communities
and eventually the whole country will benefit. They are committed to having a national
resolution passed and finding ways to get the word out.
"There is a social thing going on here," Mr. Smith says. "With the
Internet and people online, you can be better friends with an online neighbor who
lives in Peru and not even know the people who live next door. The world has opened
up to us and we have kind of forgotten that there is a small world right where we
are."
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